Dead’s Backwoods Hillbilly Horrors
Bad, bad, bad, bad, bad. This movie sucks worse than finding out Rosie O’Donnell is posing for Playboy. The Lake sisters, Brielle, Kelly and Samantha, inherit a motel left to them by a grandfather they never knew they had. So, they take off for the lake along with their significant others for a nice little look-see slash camping trip. Oh, wait. Did I mention that their family is a bunch of in-breds who want to keep it in the family? I didn’t? Oh, must have slipped my mind. I mean it’s not every day you get to see a mom and son kissing like they were newlyweds. Oh, and if you ever wonder what those annoying cavemen did before Geico then look no further than this movie. The two inbred brothers look just like them.
The 2007 horror film Lake Dead brings gruesome secrets and rural terrors bubbling to the surface in familiar but sufficiently chilling fashion. When three sisters inherit a motel on a remote lake from their estranged grandfather, they unravel a twisted legacy of inbreeding and violence.
Director George Bessudo steers the film along genre lines, as the vacationing college students encounter leering locals and become stalked by murderous hillbilly cannibals. The backwoods setting provides claustrophobic isolation, and the motel itself hides grotesque history beneath its surface.
While the plot treads predictable ground, Lake Dead delivers sufficiently nasty practical gore effects as the body count rises. The sadistic villains spring twisted traps, leading to wince-inducing moments of brutality. An oppressively gloomy atmosphere accompanies the friends’ dawning realization of the nightmarish situation.
Performances and pacing could be sharper, but Lake Dead ultimately accomplishes its basic slasher premise once the blood starts flowing. For a grimly predictable yet gruesome ride into rural horror territory, Lake Dead trades story originality for ruthless, grindhouse-style carnage. Just don’t swim in the lake.
There is not one redeeming quality to this film. There is no feasible plot, horrible acting, and a script that wouldn’t even work as a porno film. It’s movies like this that make people hate horror films. In this case, I really can’t say that I blame them.
Sorry-No Trivia for this film. But you will be glad to know that no inbreds were harmed during the making of this film.
Alex Quinn as Bill Welsh
Tara Gerard as Samantha Lake
Kelsey Crane as Brielle Lake
Kelsey Wedeen as Kelly Lake
Jim Devoti as Ben Graham
Vanessa Viola as Amy Leigh
Malea Richardson as Tanya Holt
James C. Burns as Sheriff Chuck Lake
Christian Stokes as Abel Lake
Trevor Torseth as Kane Lake
Directed by George Bessudo
Written by Daniel P. Coughlin